Trying to Conceive - Avoiding 'Mechanical Sex'

If you're trying to conceive, we hope that you're having lots of fun and spontaneous sex with your partner. Obviously, having sex is a precursor to becoming pregnant for most couples, however we're finding more and more that for many couples who are trying to conceive, the sex becomes almost mechanical. We would like to open a debate about sexual relations and trying to conceive.

The main reason that we mention it is because we recently received an email from one of our readers, it went along the following lines, although obviously we have been careful not to give away any personal details.

You may be surprised at the number of emails we receive that are similar to the one above. We have called this the "too much sex affect". Not that having too much sex is a bad thing, it is just that it is possible we can become sensitive to sex and as a result enjoy it less. For our partners, having sex because we are trying to conceive can make them feel more like a sperm bank than a loving partner, so it is worth considering this affect.

If your partner is making excuses about having sex whilst you are trying to conceive, it is very important to have a conversation with them about why this is. Almost without doubt there will be a reason, one that if left unresolved will continue to harm your chances of conception. Common reasons given are provided below:

• The partner has gone off the idea of having a baby
• You've been trying to conceive for a long time and your partner fears that it may be his fault that you have failed to conceive
• You're having sex only because you are trying to conceive
• The only thing that seems to be keeping you together is because you are trying to conceive.

As you can see, the reasons above are quite serious. This is why we should try to understand them as early as possible. Many of the reasons are about fear and uncertainty and can be resolved when both sides understand where each other is coming from.

Regarding the point about having sex only because you are trying to conceive, this is by far the most common reason given by men for going off sex. As hard as it is for us women to understand, the complex mind of a man works in mysterious ways, focus on them as individuals, make time for them and try to resort back to love making when you are both in the mood, not just when ever the best time to conceive is.

Read more of our articles on trying to conceive

Trying to Conceive - One Couples Inspirational Story
Keeping Relaxed and Balanced When Trying to Conceive
How to Get Pregnant
Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage
When to Conceive
Fastest Way to Conceive
Best Day to Conceive