Miscarriage: Even Male Partners Feel PainLosing an unborn child to untimely miscarriage is a painful experience for the mother who had been carrying him or her in the womb. All attention and sympathy is directed towards the grieving mother, and very few friends and members of the family acknowledge the father’s feelings in this unfortunate event. The truth is, male partners feel as much pain and frustration as their female counterparts. Just because male partners don’t say or do much, nor do they cry, doesn’t mean they aren’t “with” the mother. Their lack of emotions may signal many things. Firstly, a father may be in emotional shock. This happens especially when he has learned to accept the pregnancy and has begun bonding with the baby. This is also more apparent for male partners who have seen the child through ultrasound imaging. Secondly, a father may choose to be aloof because he thinks that if he shows his weak side, no one will stand strong while his wife or female partner is grieving. Thirdly, a man may drown himself with work, sports or friends. This does not mean he cares. It may be an indication that he is struggling with his feelings and is desperate to find a diversion. It is crucial to remember that males, especially those who wanted the baby in the first place, look forward to the pregnancy. Just as their female partners, they dream of seeing the baby and watching it grow so they can play. However, males and females grieve very differently, but that doesn’t mean a man should not receive the support for family, friends and health providers. It is important to respect a man’s silence and listen to him when he’s ready to talk. During this time when the female partner is deeply affected, a friend of family member may be the best person to offer support for the man. Related Articles
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